sakit blakang!

hari nie seharian d bilik ..arrgh wtf ..sakit belakang sdahh tdur2 on9.. baring2... sgt bosan ...and have a little conflict with my bf.. hmm apalagi ...malas la mau cerita yg x best ... flashback ..hari6 ,ahad, isnin,selasa dan rabu.. sy cuti! wah lamanya...mula2 mau balik kg ari 6 tapi disebabkan xda org d rumahh jadi sy x jadi balik.. then my bf bawa sy balik kg dia ..dan stay 2 nite there ..heheh..tapi xda tejalan2 jauhh.hmm.. xpala

OMG

OMG wat had happen ..suddenly i remembered him..oh no! why ??? last night (2 days ago) i have a dream with him ..and he is with my bf ..he,me and my bf! my bf is befiren with him without knowing wat hx between us..but its only the dream..its so crazy!! but i cant lie..my heart now cant stop thinking of him..how can it be..its end 5 years ago...argghhh.. i still miss him :(( nope! i dont!! i hate him ,i have no feeling to him anymore ..huhuhu... why suddenly i remember him and all of our memories...hmm why ??

the truth is i really love my bf..really !!! i love him. sy dapat rasa di segenap nadi dan setiap hembusan nafas sy...and stipa hembusan nafas sy merasakannya.. its  i love u //i love u .. i love u by...i love u ... i really love u ..u are my life...how can i 4get and say i didnt love u ..cuz i do... i do really love u ...:(( :((

yup watever

huh ..long tyme xmenulis cnie..kinda of bz.. by the way ..this is my private diary ...mungkin bukan mcm blog biasa yg org lain buat ... its more like my diary ..i write here ,wat i been through everyday and u are lucky cuz u have read my personal life..which i didnt share his story to other people even my fam and besfren.
imbas2 balik ..hmm banyak yg sdah berlaku ..heppy2 day ..sad day..bz day ...stressful day ...so many ..but itulah life kan...hmm
24 nov - mlm lepak2 at my bf fren house..play game..:)) so happy with them .sy pandai sdah men ckit2 ..ckit ja la..:) :)
25 nov- my bf balik at his house ,,with his uncle and cousin .ada kerja dorg . kinda a bz day for me that tyme. sy mgurus latihan keselamatan kebakaran at my work place.. kinda a stressful day ! arghh ..but congratz to myself sbb dpat mngurus dgn baik sekali wpun x perfect ..sy sgt x puas hati sebb sy hanya setiausaha tapi bertugas mcm penyelaras,,, huhuhuh benci..tapi its ok ..sy dapat pengalaman baru lahh. petang tu jam 5.30 bergerak balik kg ..alone,,in rain,,dark...huhu...2 hours perjalanan....and i think my car break have a problem that tyme....:(( :((
 jam 8 malam sampai d rumah.
26 nov- lawatan akreditasi  ..wah ! so happy berada d hometown sendiri ! dan mmg tempat kerja sgt jauh beza dgn tmpt kerja skg ..........but i learn.....i will improve my service and management later ........:) ) sempat lagi jalan2 with my fren at pekan kgau ...balik petang ...mlm,,sakit kepala huhu
27 nov- still at home..saturday ..hantar my sis p kerja ,,then lepak2 jap..balik rumah jam1pm... kgau is so hot..huhu..at my home pun so hot ...petang tu sy asyik tidur ja la..sakit kepala..line internet pun x brapa ok d kg...
28 nov -sunday .CHURCH . then petang tu jam3 mcm tu balik ......mlm stay2 jap at my bf aunt home..then back home.
 29 nov-  WORKING..huhuh...and today working again ...so many to do ..hmm..cont later. :) :/

sweet nite !

semalam stay jap at his aunt house but so kind of boring there..hmm so mengantuk ..dan x selesa sbb ramai org sana.. jam 10 balik at my house ,,my bf play games (daun terup) ,, dia ajar sy main lap lap :))
dan sy ajar dia main game heart attack dan kaya miskin...its so fun and funny too! laughing and laughing :))

 im happy ...
tapi hari nie perang dingin lagi ..hmm mcm2 ..:((

hepyy tyme with my bf

just now sy at my room..on9 ,tdur2 ,,rest2 alone..kelmarin bf sy bawa p kg dia,lepak2 sana jap,, then mlm lepak2 pula d rumah aunt dia..panggang2 ayam with his cousinss.. :)) its so sweet ... semlam my bf stay at my house then we bangun lambat (hehe) dkt jam1 baru kuar p kedai..makan2..then go to his aunt house again ..stay2 kejap then now dia p training men bola,, and he sent me home...
hari khamis petang or pagi jumaat sy akan balik hometown  ..sebab pagi ari jumaat kami ada lawatan akreditasi  ,pastu sy direct balik home lah ..
and maybe after this ,,tiap minggu i will be come back home at hometown becuz my sister from PD will come back and my sister will get married this end of the year..and mau sambut xmas lagi with my family .. i will miss my boyfriend so much ! and sy x sampai hati tggalkan dia alone at here...he must always ask me to come back here like he always do ...hmmm
but one thing ,tadi dia ckp mungkin start next year his life will become more better sbb dia sdah start kerja  ..owh i hope he will be the same... sy akut bila dia start ada duit sendiri ,,dia tu pun mula berubahh..:( tapi i hope not...:( he will need me also ..im sure..
...tapi bila fkir2 sy mula takut ,,,ni maknanya sy mula harus berfikir utk serius dgn dia... sy kan berkahwin dgn dia ! mm jadi maknanya sy harus stay d sini selama2nya ...bekerja di tempat tu untuk jangka masa yg panjang ..adakah dia kan benarkan sy utk pergi ?? dan adakah sy sanggup utk pergi dari sini??
 sy sangat bingung ... kdg2 sy rasa sy belum bersedia utk nie semua..tadi sy on facebook dan sy lihat kawan2 sy semuanya enjoy berabis! jalan2 sana sini ...p labuan ,p lagod seberang ,,enjoy d kk , p bali and overseas.. owh im so jeless... sy pun mau jalan2 ...tapi bf sy mesti melarang sy jalan2 ...tapi bila sy bawa dia jalan2 dia x mau ...hmm wat can i do ...:(( :(( sometimes sy rasa mau pergi jauh dan bebas dari semua nie...tapi ..adakah sy sanggup?? sy sdh hbiskan masa hampir 2 tahun bersama dia,, terlalu rugi ...jika semuanya berakhirr..

:))

yup im active again in my blogger ,,mula2 rasa malas mau tulis then sy mau delete this blog tapi bila sy baca balik ,,rasa sayang pula mau delate,,lagipun i write since january 2010..owh a lotsss of thing happen this year ...hmm so many ,,, but let the past happen lah,then face the future..:)

today 20/11/2010 hari sabtu ,,sy x balik kg hari nie eventhough my sis and little brother ask me to come back ..i stay with my bf at his kg,,stay2 there ..i love my bf so much ..i love him ...:)

copy paste from my tumblahh 5

17 nov jam 5:16pm
 di bilik sajaa„, wah bosan ! hari ni cuti raya aidiladha.. tadi tangari ada kuar jap p hari raya d rumah kwn bf saya„lepak2 jap then sy balik rumah balik.„, ermm
****

18 nov jam 12:12am
alone at my room„,tadi jam 7lbh p rumah my bf aunt„ makan sana..dduk2 tgo tv,stay2 ..men game…then pas tu my bf bawa balik at my home„
sana ada dorg ppk tu lepak2 d bawah rumah„ sy segan kalo dorg nampak bf sy naik atas rumah sy..jadi sy suruh my bf balik dulu …x sangka pula dia marah „ dia ckp ‘sama mum sy x malu „tapi sama lelaki bujang malu„” sy ckp nt dorg ckp2 sy masa kerja nanti „ sebab sy hari2 tjumpa dorg tyme kerja„ my bf ckp nie bukan 1st tyme dorg namapk sy naik cni „ lagipun ramai juga org yg sdah nampak & tahu yg my bf slalu stay at my house… :( dear x fham…:(
dan skg dia marah2 dan buat dingin sama sy …:( dear ..sy bukan apa„ tapi dear faham2 la bah „ sy malu mau kerja sama dorg kalo dorg tau sy slalu bawa lelaki stay at my room„ kalo x tjumpa hari2 xpa..:(
 dear miss u …semalam pun by x stay cnie„i already miss u much :( im sorry tapi by patut faham bah …:(